Counting

Heather and I have a game we play ith Malry every night when we put him to bed.  His mattress is on the floor to allow hime to get out of bed when he wants.  It also makes it easier for us to get him in the bed.

The game we play consists of me holding Malry by his hands and Heather holding him by his feet.  As we hold his hands and feet we count to three.  While counting we sway back and forth towards the bed and on threee we lift him up and set him on the bed.  Malry gets and jolt out of it and laughs most of the time.  Tonight I stalled out on two for some reason and didn't lift.  Just as I should have been saying three, Malry tensed up and kind of grunted.  When he did this I looked at him in amazement and said " Oh my god, he can count"! I immediately realized this was more than likely not the case.  I asked Heather if she had pulled on him when I missed three.  She said she had. He had tensed up because she had pulled on his legs. It took just a couple of second to realize how ridiculous the notion was.  That couple of seconds were some of the most joyous seconds of my life.  It was like 100 Christmas mornings wrapped up together and lived in one brief moment.  It was splendid.

Feeling Awesome

I'm not a guy that usually has a reason to say I feel awesome.  Tonight, Greggory, my younger son, made me feel awesome.  On the night of his 13th Birthday he came into the living room and just simply said "Thank you".  Heather and I looked at him and said "For what?".

"For being awesome"

"Really?"

"Yes"

"What makes you want to say that?"

"Because I think you need some recognition once in a while."

Enter tears and hugs.
My son, whom I think is one of the kindest, coolest, smartest and most loving kids on planet Earth, thinks his parents are awesome. And he thinks it enough to say so.

This is not a compliment that is spawned from spoiling a child with material things.  We try to give him things he needs and some he wants but we don't shower him with physical items.  This was a heart-felt and genuine expression of gratitude, I believe, from a boy who is beginning to see the world from more mature eyes...a young man's eyes.

I now feel so encouraged that maybe, just maybe, the hard lessons and the striving to set a good moral foundation for him is taking hold.  I do believe that my son has just made my life.

Kool Aid

Heather and I were getting Malry ready for bed tonight and I decided to get him something to drink.  Malry has been tube fed since he was nine so he doesn't drink much by mouth.  We give him water by mouth but tonight I decided to give him Kool Aid.  We give it to hime with a small syringe a little at the time to keep him from getting choked. When I gave hime the first little bit it startled him.  The next bit he swallow with enthusiasm and smilled at me like it was nectar of the gods.  I'm not sure I have ever tasted something that made me that happy.  He was so impressed with it that he opened his mouth like a baby bird anticipating the next milliliter of pure heaven.  This impressed me so much.  The things we take for granted are so numerous. I'm not really sure I know what else to say about it.  How simple is your life that you get that much pleasure from the taste of a cherry flavored beverage?  Sometimes I wish my life was that simple.

So Proud Of Greggory

Twenty Years

Heather and I just celebrated our twentieth wedding anniversary.  I'm very proud of that. The subject actually generated some pretty good conversation between us over the course of the day.  Some conversation was suitable for public consumption and some was not.  What came up over dinner was the most interesting.  She and I both had been asked how we did it.  Making our marriage last for twenty years hasn't been easy.  Sometimes it was damn hard.  It would have been much easier to call it quits.  We agreed that it was work at times.  As we were having this conversation over dinner I came to realize that the hardest part of keeping things together was working on me.  I find my self constantly working to ensure that I am a person worth staying with.  I have to be aware of my faults.  I have to be aware of them and willing to fix them; as willing to fix them as she is to accept them.  If I take for granted that she will accept them and not be willing to change them then the relationship becomes lop-sided.  When it becomes out of balance then I think you have a problem.  The cool part is that you can change this if you see it happening.  You can tell your ego to take a hike.  Be the person that apologizes for the verbal jab that was uncalled for.  Fight the urge to say the first thing that comes to mind during an argument.  Be the person that is worthy of the love you receive.  I'm not saying this is a rule for all couples.  I'm saying this is a part of what has worked for us the past 20 years.  Thanks for reading.